A Good Reason

Aristotle believed that everything happens for a reason… and that every experience in your life was designed to shape and reform you into the greatest version of yourself.

Based on my personal experience, I would have to agree with him.

I would not be sitting here today had it not been for my son, Bill’s, death. I would have never believed that almost 10 years ago when he passed away, because I was definitely not the greatest version of myself for several years after that.

I dove deeper and deeper into the depths of darkness.

Today, I know that the only thing that prevents you from becoming the greatest version of yourself is having the wisdom to see it.

The holidays are approaching fast, and although this is a joyful time for many, for others it can be difficult if loss, tragedy, or upsets within the family have occurred.

Holidays were rough after Bill’s passing. For the first couple of months, I was in complete shock. I don’t remember much, but thank goodness for good systems and processes, because in my absence, my agency still flourished.

One day, I heard someone tell a story in regards to grieving the loss of her husband. She said “Next week is my belated husband’s birthday, and it’s not going to be a good day.” The person they said this to replied “Wow, it must be really miserable preparing to be miserable a week from now.”

Something snapped in me when I heard that, and I said to myself; “NO more…NO more feeling sorry for myself…NO more preparing to be miserable.”

So, now, although I am still reminded of Bill’s death around the holidays, I don’t prepare to be miserable.

We started BGI Systems shortly after my breakthrough, and it has been awesome to help so many agents around the country to be successful. Even though my son can never be replaced and his loss is still felt, my life is of significance today due to my decision to get sober 6 years ago and open this company helping other agents find their own success stories.

I want to share some reflective statements:

In times of struggle, every negative experience you have can be viewed as an opportunity for growth and learning.

In times of healing, some people find it hard to believe that everything happens for a reason. Through our lowest points in life, we gain our wisdom and we allow for a new-found strength to emerge. You have to remember, without loss, we wouldn’t appreciate gain.

In times of chaos, things will appear to be random, but often, appearances lie. True chaos cannot be chaos as long as you have choices. A meaningful coincidence may be viewed as a random event, yet to the eye of the beholder, that event has a real purpose and meaning.

In times of reflection, the pieces of the puzzle come together again, unfolding an awesome picture. The struggles and victories are the true molding of who you are in the present moment. With reflection, you can see why it had to happen the way it did. Hindsight is always 20/20.

In times of happiness, it all comes together in one moment… the AHA moment. This is when you finally see the wisdom behind the subconscious choices you’ve made…the clarity is finally shining through.